After a bit of technical CF, the show gets underway with Gabe’s indifference. Due to a Maryland snow and ice storm, Tom and Gabe will have to stay at Addy’s house for the next week. Do hookers carry Viagra? For some reason, Gabe had trouble getting artists to draw him a picture of Jesus, Lord of the Dragons. If any listeners want to help out, it’s muscular Jesus on a red dragon, both with Santa hats, with a surf board. Which makes sense, because Jesus is Santa, as we all know. Damon calls in because sometimes the Damon clips are just not enough. Everyone remembers when Gabe wished vaginal cancer on his ex-girlfriend. Oddly enough, Gabe is the nice one on the show. The conversation turns to talk of the mundane details of being blind. Tom explains briefly that Jesus was not just crucified, he was hanged, drawn and quartered. “Who is crazier, me or Ann Curry?” The Magic 8 Ball says Addy has colon cancer. Serves him right for trying to live healthy. “Cancer is very stressful.” Apparently stressful enough to give you cancer?
Archive for December, 2008
The show starts off on a positive note with talk of constipation and bowel movements. When they get to the mucus, Gabe decides Addy is dying. Time to call dibs on all of Addy’s stuff. Gabe explains why electronics cost what they do. Addy says that people who disrespect the iPhone are just mad because they do not have one. “It’s funny because it’s racist.” What if Obama actually got shot? Gabe says it would be just like a zombie movie. Speaking of which, what constitutes a real zombie? And why is the new James Bond gay? Break for metal. “Do you like Huey Lewis and the News?” Gabe’s Thanksgiving story involved toast, jelly beans and a black guy. You’re a good man, Gabe. It is totally fine to be attracted to a step-cousin. The show ends early because Addy has cancer or something.