Episode #256 – Bagful of Guns

July 4th, 2015

Gabe is planning to do a new podcast. Gabe is the only white person at his job that does work (20:00). Gabe was in a sexy car accident (37:00). Pennsic is happening soon (48:00). Addy hates inventories in video games (57:00). Addy and Gabe revisit old news and old show topics (1:21:00). Addy is planning to smuggle guns to Florida (1:35:00). Addy and Gabe make plans for their next show in 2019 (1:58:00).

Notable show quotes:
Addy: “Camping is something poor people do.”
Addy: “Poor people don’t get vacation.”
Gabe: “Florida is going to be the end of your relationship.”

Episode #255 – Eugenics

April 25th, 2015

What should we do with unskilled poor people? Gabe and his cat are both dying (27:00). Addy is excited about Mad Max and Gabe is excited about Star Wars (50:00). Did Andre the Giant win wrestling (1:06:00)? Gabe can afford to vacation in air-conditioned places (1:16:00).

Notable show quotes:
Addy: “I love my cancer.”
Gabe: “This is the first time Harrison Ford has smiled in about twenty years.”

Episode #254 – Blind Island

March 28th, 2015

Addy has had enough of this. Addy went to Jamaica (11:00). Addy and Gabe love Jesus (36:00). How much does Addy love wresting (48:00)? In the news, people want a woman on the twenty dollar bill, the Taco Bell menu is changing, and feces is a problem (1:16:00).

Notable show quotes:
Addy: “Would you rather make out or scissor with your brother?”

Episode #253 – Yogurt

February 28th, 2015

Addy and Gabe reminisce about old show agendas. Montana wants to ban yoga pants (20:00). A teenager undergoes a penis reduction surgery (25:00). Gabe is on Nutrisystem (37:00). Leonard Nimoy is dead (1:04:00). Gabe is playing new space games and Addy only plays Unreal Tournament 2004 (1:20:00).

Notable show quotes:
Addy: “It’s powdered vagina yogurt. All you gotta do is add water.”
Addy: “My cat better not die. I’ll kill her.”

Episode #252 – Life Truth from the Morbidly Obese

January 24th, 2015

Movies make no money. Dieting is difficult (13:00). Rats love cocaine (36:00). Man on Reddit blogs his wife’s adultery (42:00). Addy’s sister’s destination wedding did not end well (50:00). Nature is efficient at handling corpses (1:05:00). H1Z1 is apparently an awful video game (1:16:00). Hostages are good business (1:28:00).

Notable show quotes:
Addy: “I love the Jews.”
Gabe: “My weight is Gabe.”
Addy: “What about masturbating?”
Gabe: “I’m so fat.”
Gabe: “Just get some plutonium.”
Gabe: “Why do you love terrorism, Addy?”

Episode #251 – Stripper Thursday

January 17th, 2015

Do humans need their hearts? Gabe is baffled by Apple products (15:00). Poor people have no pride, time, or skills (28:00). Is 40 a good retirement age (50:00)? The Addy and Gabe video game will be awesome (1:00:00). Gabe’s video game podcast is still forthcoming (1:13:00).

Notable show quotes:
Addy: “Poor people just want to be poor.”

Episode #250 – Videotape

January 3rd, 2015

A woman with cats is looking for a cheap room. The Interview is out now (25:00). Addy is confused about movies and comic books (40:00). Addy is playing SimCity and Unreal Tournament 2004 (1:10:00). In the news, vaginas can be grown, professors are correcting students, and man flies drone in wrong neighborhood. (1:17:00).

Notable show quotes:
Gabe: “If I was hot, my picture would be on everything. I would wear a shirt with just my face on it.”
Gabe: “Comments are the voice of America.”

Alternate show titles:
Pregnant Box
Employed White Gang

Episode #249 – Boat Morgue

December 20th, 2014

People are whispering on the internet for some reason. Addy is ready to be thrifty in 2015 (30:00). Gabe was on a big boat (38:00). Time for Christmas gifts (1:05:00)! Healthcare prices make no sense (1:20:00). In the news there is an attempted abortion, a game of Russian roulette, confusion about the population of Heaven, and racist emails from Sony (1:31:00).

Notable show quotes:
Gabe: “The internet, instead of bringing us together, has isolated every person on this planet.”
Addy: “I am sick of stairs.”
Gabe: “I am so gay for you, Dad.”

Alternate show titles:
-Creepy Whispering
-International Waters
-DiGennaro Hog
-Demon Spiders with Tits
-Segregated Heaven

Protected: Episode #248 – Ferguson

November 28th, 2014

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Episode #247 – In Defense of Facsimiles

November 15th, 2014

Are facsimiles still relevant? One of Gabe’s neighbors might be dead (26:00). Apparently there was an election (38:00). Can a mobile application save abused women (50:00)? Landing on a comet is somehow offensive to women (1:18:00). Gabe explains gender problems (1:30:00).

Notable Show Quote:
Gabe: “I know everything when it comes to problems.”